There are three basic levels of reflective listening that may deepen or increase the intimacy and thereby change the affective tone of an interaction. This may feel presumptuous, yet it leads to clarification and greater exploration, whereas questions tend to interrupt the client’s flow. The listener’s voice turns down at the end of a reflective listening statement. Reflective listening is meant to close the loop in communication to ensure breakdowns don’t occur.

Listener gives a different interpretation to what the words mean.

Listening breakdowns occur in any of three places:

It includes an interest in what the person has to say and respect for the person’s inner wisdom. This is a way of thinking that accompanies good reflective listening. It is vital to learn to think reflectively. Examples are misinterpreting what is said or assuming what a person needs. Sometimes the “skills” we use in working with clients do not exemplify reflective listening but instead serve as roadblocks to effective communication. Reflective listening appears easy, but it takes hard work and skill to do well. It is the pathway for engaging others in relationships, building trust, and fostering motivation to change. Reflective listening is a primary skill in outreach. If I were in your shoes, I don’t know if I could have managed nearly so well.You handled yourself really well in that situation.You are clearly a very resourceful person.I appreciate that you are willing to meet with me today.To be effective, affirmations must be genuine and congruent. Affirmations build confidence in one’s ability to change. What have you tried before to make a change?Īffirmations are statements and gestures that recognize client strengths and acknowledge behaviours that lead in the direction of positive change, no matter how big or small.What do you think you will lose if you give up _?.What are the good things about _ and what are the less good things about it?.How would you like things to be different?.What can you tell me about your relationship with your parents?.Did you have a good relationship with your parents?.Note how the topic is the same, but the responses will be very different: Closed questions typically elicit a limited response such as “yes” or “no.” The following examples contrast open vs. Open questions are the opposite of closed questions. Of course, when asking open questions, you must be willing to listen to the person’s response. Open questions should be used often in conversation but not exclusively. Open questions invite others to “tell their story” in their own words without leading them in a specific direction. Open questions, affirmation, reflective listening, and summary reflections (OARS) are the basic interaction techniques and skills that are used “early and often” in the motivational interviewing approach. Motivational Interviewing is an “empathic, person-centred counselling approach that prepares people for change by helping them resolve ambivalence, enhance intrinsic motivation, and build confidence to change.” (Kraybill and Morrison, 2007) (Adapted from handouts by David Rosengren and from Miller & Rollnick, Motivational Interviewing, 2nd Edition, 2002)

Motivational Interviewing: The Basics, OARS This resource provides basic information about the principles of communicating using motivational interviewing. Motivational Interviewing provides a foundation for assisting individuals with developing the rationale for beginning change in their lives.

Active reflective listening